Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Friendships ... WILL THEY ENDURE THE TEST OF TIME?

Hi, all,

I am so sorry I didn't get the chance to post yesterday. It has been CRAZY the past few days. But before I get into that, I would like to welcome my new friends to my blog.

Twelve in the past few weeks. I am almost at 500... I still have less that two weeks to my blogaversary. Of course I will do something special for all of you. This year has one of THE most amazing years I've had and it is mainly because of all of you.

My new and old friends ... Thank you. Lee, Natzers, Joshua, In luv with words. Daina, Lynn, Patty, Khlemoyne, Ann, Mish, Jeremy and Kristen. I am looking so forward to getting to know all of you a little better.

Something unexpected and wonderful happened to me today. An old college friend, who after so many years, faded from my life because of her obligations with work and family. Although I tried to keep up the friendship, it had been one sided for many years and frankly, I got tired of it.

I finally wrote an direct email to her explaining how I felt and what I expect from a real friend. We had been through so much together for years, even after we graduated.

Months went by with now response. At that point I buried the past and looked ahead. Never expecting to hear from her again.

Two weeks ago I received a phone call from her. After an extensive apology, she asked if she could visit. This was not the first time she had wanted to visit and it never happened.

I was skeptical. Why wouldn't I be? She ran by a few random dates. We picked the week and the conversation ended.

Ten minutes later, I received an email. She had booked her flight. She was coming on the Oct. 17th. My jaw dropped. She was really coming to visit.

Well, yesterday she flew in and I have to say it was like we saw each other last week instead of a decade ago. She's staying until Saturday and we have the best itinerary. With fall leaves blustering about and temps in the low 50's it will be great walking weather.

We have reconnected and it feels GREAT! She is practically like a sister to me. Sometimes you just have to let your friends know how you really feel. And if they are true, they WILL endure the test of time.

Has this ever happened to you? I would really love to hear your story.

Have a great Tuesday everyone.

Don't forget my third installment of the Rule of 3 will post either tomorrow or Thursday. It will be tough to write because of my friend's presence, BUT, of course I will do it. She is amazed that I am an illustrator turned interior designer and now writer. Life is FULL of surprises.

39 comments:

  1. That is a wonderful thing in your life! Friendships can be complicated at times; it's hard to know when to back away and when to give someone that extra nudge that they need. I'm glad that you're getting together and hope you have a great weekend "leaf-peeping". :-)

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  2. That is such a heartwarming story, Michael. I hope my friendships stand the test of time, but it's very hard being so far from Australia. I have a couple of girlfriends I adore back home, but I think we may have all changed too much since last seeing each other. I guess I'll see next time I visit (and if they ever visit me. it's been ten years and still nothing :-/) but it's okay, I understand that it's VERY expensive to fly from Aust to Greece!

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  3. I love this story. Friends are so important.

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  4. That's so nice. I'm glad you got the courage to email her.

    As a matter of fact, I just emailed my best friend from back home. Sadly I have not heard from her.

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  5. I'm so glad you've reconnected with your friend! That is a great feeling. I tend to be the person for whom life and family have taken over and I get neglectful, but if someone was EVER important in my life, they remain important, so I'm sure she appreciated you letting her know.

    Congrats on your flurry of followers, too!

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  6. I've cut many people off for the one-sided nature of our conversations. I give, they take, but never give anything back. It takes a lot of my energy to interact with people, and when nothing comes back, that's when it's done. Glad you were able to connect with a friend again.

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  7. So happy that you get to spend time together. Yes, I have a best friend, who now lives miles away from me. We can go months without chatting, and then when we pick up the phone and talk it's like we spoke only yesterday. :) Priceless...

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  8. That is so great! I love hearing stories like that. Glad you were able to be honest and connect--and have a great visit!!!

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  9. How wonderful, real life fairytale, reuniting with a friend.

    So happy for you, and thank you, for sharing!

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  10. Two of my friends I've had so long I no longer keep track. e can go ages without seeing each other and talking little. Then we pick u as if we'd only been in the next room.
    Few are in that friend circle and those seem to stay forever. I've been very blessed.

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  11. That's great she finally made the effort! I think women are more likely to do so than men. I gave up a number of one-sided friendships over the years and those people still remain gone.

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  12. People are like the Dead Sea or the Red Sea. The Dead Sea only takes, never gives so it became stagnant and filled with bitter salt. The Red Sea both gives and takes. It is alive and rich in life.

    We must remember to be Red Sea friends. And you were wise. Give your silent friend space to be themselves but then tell them how you feel. Mind-reading only exists in my books! LOL. Roland

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  13. What an encouraging story! It's great to hear that you and your friend were able to reconnect. Enjoy your time to its fullest!

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  14. I'm glad you reconnected with your friend, Michael!

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  15. That's so lovely - have an amazing time together
    Lx

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  16. What a great feeling to reconnect after so long! Enjoy your time together!!

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  17. I've never had someone I wrote off track me down later, but I've reconnected with a dear friend fifteen years later and it was like we'd never been apart.

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  18. Awesome; I know how much staying in touch means to you Michael.

    I am, unfortunately one of those friends that that has a hard time reconnecting with others - I'm the one not responding. When I walk away from a friendship I feel I have very good reason.

    I'm glad your visit is going so well though. If anyone could bridge a relationship gap it would be you Michael. Have a wonderful visit :)

    .......dhole

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  19. What a wonderful happening, Michael. I am thrilled you and your friend have reconnected as the friendship sounded too special to lose. Enjoy the rest of the week together.
    M

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  20. Awww, such a wonderful story, Michael. Life can get so demanding at times, we don't ever want to lose touch, but unfortunately we do. What's great about long time friends is that you can pick up where you left off as if it you were never apart. I'm so glad you reconnected! <3

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  21. That's a lovely story. I have one a bit like that with a friend of the family in Sweden. It's been a few years now, and we were doing so well to catch up. He even came to see me at Uni while he was in the Uk doing volunteer work. I must look him up somehow. Glad you had a great time catching up :)

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  22. So cool to reconnect with old friends like that. I know I can sometimes be bad at keeping up with friends and relatives. We all get busy and preoccupied sometimes.
    A few years ago I was thinking about an old friend from junior high school who I hadn't seen or communicated with in over 30 years and out of the blue he called me just as I had been trying to locate him on Google. Not long after that he flew out from Arkansas to visit me in L.A. That was a nice surprise.


    Lee
    Tossing It Out
    Please see my guest post at:
    So You Want to be a Writer?

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  23. This has definitely happened to me, but with family more than friends. Telling them how you feel is a must, though the results aren't always what we'd like, they are what we need. I'm so glad your situation turned out so good!

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  24. what a happen ending. we have all lost friends over time, without such a great ending. I wish I had reconnected with some of my friends, I have tried to contact some of the numerous times over the decade since high school, but no response, and I have cut them as a loss. :/

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  25. I'm so glad you reconnected with your friend! That's a wonderful story. :)

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  26. OH yeah. I've lost every friend that I've ever made (well almost). I have two...Tomeka and my friend James. I watch t.v. alone, go to movies alone, read books etc. I'm perfectly fine with that. What gets me is that people that haven't bothered to check in on me for years will pop up and say hello, apologize for not keeping in touch, and then ask for money. I tell them to fuck off. I'm glad you reconnected though. It sounds wonderful.

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  27. Hi Bro, I am so happy for you. It is wonderful to be able to reconnect with friends....Or so I have heard :)

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  28. can't wait for your next installment and so happy you reconnected with an old friend. I had a similar experience a few years ago; it was great fun :)

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  29. That was an incredibly sweet story. I can't I've ever had the chance to have an experience like that. Social networking has made it easy to keep tabs on old friends, no matter where they are. Glad to here this awesomeness from your end! :)

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  30. It's wonderful you've made a reconnection. You are very fortunate. So many people get caught up in the day to day- which just happens - they forget friends and they slowly fade away.

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  31. Hmm, well, I WAS supposed to host a certain blogger friend named Michael at my house on Saturday, but he cancelled on me...apparently for this other friend....

    Totally kidding. Glad you reconnected and we'll get together some other time!
    erica

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  32. What a happy story! My best friend and I have been through some rough patches (especially when we went off to varsity together and got boyfriends and starting neglecting each other... oops!), but she's very good at not letting a problem simmer for too long (I, on the other hand, am terrified of confrontation!) and so we are still great friends :-)

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  33. Michael, one of the things I admire about you is your loyalty to people and your appreciation of people, shown by your commitment to your blogging friends. I think we all have stories like this, but we may not have been as proactive as you have been. Life gets out of control with busyness and it's often hard to spend the time we need maintaining friendships. This is a shame, as we then end up with just our current circle around us.

    Good for you for your efforts which had a great outcome. The friendships we make early in life cannot be replicated. I hope you have the most amazing time together.

    Have been enjoying reading Rule of Three stories. I would have loved to do this as it's right up my alley, but just couldn't fit it in. Have enjoyed your story so far and looking forward to your next episode.

    How little we're communicating lately is testament to how over-extended we are at the moment, but I hope we can pick up our blogging relationship soon. At least life's never boring.

    However, now we're being told that floods will hit us again this year, perhaps worse than last year. As half the houses are still not rebuilt, I shiver at the thought. At the moment the weather is glorious, but Australia knows how to throw a disaster.

    Write good and hard Michael (and BG is still waiting!)

    Denise

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  34. That's awesome! Thanks for sharing your story. I definitely have friends that I run into when I go home to visit, but it isn't so much like this. Sad, I know. Even recent friends are awkward to see sometimes. But I hear ya about the one sided thing being very hard. I like to keep in contact with my friends. Once they have shoved me aside too many times, though, the effort just doesn't seem worth it.

    I'm glad you and your friend reconnected though and it wasn't awkward. I hope you had a great weekend!

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  35. Since the invention of places like Facebook and Myspace, it became much easier to reconnect with friends. I have a few good friends who I've reconnected with since joining all these social networks. We're lucky.

    Draven Ames

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  36. I have a college friend who fell out of touch for 10 years, and then when she called me out of the blue it was exactly like you said - like we'd just seen each other a week ago. We've since done girls weekends and family trips together.

    I'll admit that I'm the WORST at keeping in touch - I don't know why half my friends put up with me - but I know it's important to show them once in a while that I'm willing to make the effort, and I'm so happy your friend did that for you and that you've had an amazing week!

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  37. That's so great! True friendships do withstand the tests of time. I had this happen to me as well, with 2 of my bff from high school. It was a few years after we'd had kids and were settled into family life, and I felt like they made no effort to maintain our friendship. I was ready to look for new friends. But I emailed them as well, telling them just how I felt, and they were very surprised. They didn't consider themselves significant enough in my life and had no idea I considered them my bff still. So you just never know until you tell others how you feel. I'm so glad you two found each other again!

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  38. That's wonderful, Michael. My room mate in college and I fell apart over...boys. So silly. We refound each other about 10 years later. It was like we had just been apart for a week. We left off (minus the boy issues) like nothing had ever gone wrong. We see each other every few years and it's always the same....like we've never been apart.

    I hope your friendship continues to grow. :D

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  39. Thanks for sharing! It's so great when friends can connect again. I did this year with friends I hadn't seen in more than 10 years!

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